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What should he have done?

March 7th, 2009 at 08:18 pm

My DH has a childhood friend that we see every three our four years. This friend has lots of issues with (past) addictions. He called my DH last night and said he had been hurt and could DH loan him about $10.00. This is the first time he ever asked for any money. DH went by the place where friend is living and he said that friend seemed pretty wasted but he gave him money anyway $20.00. I think it is going to go for drugs but can't be sure. I know DH will not give him anymore but felt sorry for him last night. Friend is 50 years old and is never going to get it together. Torn between waiting to help but not enable.

5 Responses to “What should he have done?”

  1. Chalatenango Says:
    1236458273

    Life is challenge, and everyone has different issues to deal with.
    Best of luck!
    Hopefully the right decision has been made.

  2. creditcardfree Says:
    1236458420

    A one time gesture probably won't be too big of a deal. The man has to deal with his own problems. It's good that you don't want to be an enabler.

  3. smiley2009 Says:
    1236471568

    I wouldn't worry about DH giving him money this one time I strongly believe that people can only be helped when they want to help themselves. And until he has come to terms with him self and the addiction he has he will never overcome this. As a friend I would be supportive and try to be as encouraging as you can to steer him in the right direction but that's all you can do. Even though he's 50 I don't think its ever to late for Change.

  4. Lady T Says:
    1236473245

    I would've done the same as your husband, but one time only. Smiley is right ... the person must want to get help in order for it to work. Fifty isn't too old ... it's never too late! So hopefully he will get tired of living the way he is living and get some help soon!

  5. Amber Says:
    1236479384

    I wouldn't give cash but if he needs food, then buy food. If he needs soap then buy soap. Just don't give up, pray for him, it's never too late to clean up

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